Saturday, August 28, 2010

What do YOU think is "sexy"?

What is your definition of "sexy"?

It is amazing how many different versions of "sexy", "gorgeous", and "hot" are running around out there. Remember when you were just a kid? Maybe wearing braces and saddle oxfords? Maybe wearing coke-bottle eyeglasses with rhinestones on the frames? Do you remember what your ideas of "pretty" and "cute" were back in the oldy and moldy days?

Now consider what your ideas of "Sexy" and "gorgeous" are today. Are they even in the same solar system? NOT! When I was a preteen I thought a guy was "cute" when he was lanky and scrawny and had dimples in his pink little cheeks. I thought that a gal was "pretty" when she wore ten stiff petticoats under her poodle skirt and had a perfectly under-turned, glossy pageboy 'do and was as skinny as a beanpole. Hmmm...

All of us who write romance know that somewhere out there, every heroine has her fated hero. And whether the hero is a huge, musclebound guy with green skin and torn jeans, or is a long, lean, jeans-clad cowpoke wearing a ratty T-shirt and a battered Stetson, there is a female out there just aching and waiting for him to come along.

No two women seem to see the same beauty in the same men. I prefer men with less body hair. Others prefer men who could show a poodle a thing or two. I like long, lean, hard muscle. Others love a man who is just their height and has a nice solid body. I have hissed in my breath at the sight of a man that my daughter looks at and goes, "Huh???"

Thank God we all have different tastes, or we would all be fighting over the same man. And even if he might enjoy it, I don't think we would.

Now, if you have noticed, most of my romances are about women who think they are very plain, ordinary females. And honestly, most of them are. But their heroes don't think like that. I like men who can see the beauty inside a woman's body and sparkling eyes. Men who can sense that beneath those ratty jeans and loose T-shirt there lurks a hot babe.

As I grew up, I realized that the "cutest" guys always seemed to run with the "prettiest" gals. But after a lot of these guys reached emotional maturity, they began to look a bit deeper and a lot closer at that skin-deep beauty, and after a bad experience or two...maybe a scary divorce from Miss Barbie 1969, their tastes in women took a sharp right turn. The same goes for women who marry hot men and later find clay feet in those expensive shoes.

Good looks never replace kind spirits and ethical treatment. It would be marvelous if handsome guys acted handsomely, but alas, all the adulation and chasing-after from women often turn those male heads, and a sweet, normal, not-so-drop-dead-gorgeous gal doesn't stand a chance. It would be fabulous if stunningly beautiful women acted beautifully. Not all beauty is on the outside.

So my heroes look like stunning hunks to my heroines, even if another woman would pass them by and shrug...and my heroines all look gorgeous to my heroes, even if other men have totally missed the point. Why? Because every human being has a soul mate who looks perfect to them, even if the rest of the world can't see that special beauty.

Thank God I grew up. If I were still running around with the exact same concept of "cute" and "pretty", this old world would be a sad, sad place for me, indeed...

Fran Lee

Check out my new release contest..."Woman on Fire" will be released from Ellora's Cave on September 3, 2010!


  1. I loved this blog! Our sexual preferences are buried so deep that if we can't get at them we have to use the default social standards of the day to tell us what we want.
    It's better to know thy self and make clearer choices...
    I was at a dear friend's house and saw a framed photo of her husband wearing a odd suit. I asked why her husband was wearing the suit? She said "that's not my husband that's an old photo of my father."
    The two men looked identical down to the smallest detail. She was genuinely surprised to notice that fact for the first time! lol
    XXOO Kat

  2. Fran,
    This blog demonstrates why your books stay in the hearts of us romantics!

  3. Thanks so much for the wonderfully kind comments. I appreciate them.


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