Monday, September 28, 2009


"Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus".

Yes, we've all heard that a million times and know that one important sentence speaks the truth. How many times have you wondered why a man and woman will both hear or see the same event/happening, and yet have distinctly different versions of what they saw or heard?

My husband and I play bridge with a couples group once a month. Most of the women play more often than their husbands since we belong to a "Friends" group that offers lots of daily activities for women. When it comes to couples bridge, I confess that the women in the group prefer NOT to have their husbands as partners all night...we like to spread the "male strategy" form of bridge playing so none of us get stuck with any one "Mars" player all night!

Men and women don't think alike, not even in our bridge group. The women follow certain rules of playing and tend to adhere to careful processes when bidding and playing out the hands. Men, on the other hand, see every hand as a challenge to conquer, and that's when "Man Bridge" takes effect. Strategies on playing depend on points, but men seem to overbid, assessing their cards to be better than they really are, inflating the true value of their cards.

Happened again two weekends ago at couples bridge. I will admit, some "Mars" partners I had did well, but others decided to revert to "Man Bridge" with me, and things didn't go so well for us. It's hard to keep a smile pasted on your face when a male partner puts down his cards for you and you realize he had way less points than he indicated...and, in fact, should never have bid at all! you're stuck trying to make your combined bid work!

Twice during the night, the guys yelled out, "Man Bridge" when just men were at a table. There they could play out their own rules, and we women gave each other a confidential wink...sort of a sigh of signify that we were happy they could get their "playing by Mars rules" out of their systems.

It's not just bridge, is it? How about leaving the toilet seat up? Logic would say "Leave It Down", but that somehow doesn't penetrate a "Mars" way of thinking. And, replacing the toilet paper? Why do "Mars" leave two sheets and think that's okay? Is it so hard to replace the damn roll?

I could go on and on, but we all have our own "Mars" stories to tell. I tend to think of my heroes as somewhat "Mars" when it suits my plot or scenes, but want them to rise above that definition. My heroes would never play "Man Bridge", leave the toilet seat up, and would always replace an almost empty roll of toilet paper.

How about you? Do you have "Mars" stories to tell? What about in your books or books you've read?

"Sexy Games" by April Ash is now available at


  1. Because they don't use toilet paper most of the time. They don't think about toilet paper at all, unless they are stuck in the upstairs bathroom without a fresh roll and they need it! LOL! My heroes are so involved into getting the heroine into the sack, little things like toilet paper are non-issues. :P

  2. The toilet seat has to be the worst. The DH doesn't understand how it feels to "fall in", in the middle of the night when you stumble into the bathroom, barely concious. UGH!

  3. Great blog April. There may never be complete understanding between the sexes we can only look for common ground. I must say in a problem or true crisis it's a blessing to have someone who sees the situation in a completely opposite light. Women tend to optimize known strengths. Men take risks against bad odds. That's probably why we're all still here! lol
    XXOO Kat

  4. I don't play bridge, but boy the "Man Bridge", over assessment/inflating the true value of something sure made me smile! Ain't men grand??

  5. Women can be very competitive in bridge, but the guys seem to be willing to take more risks. "Venus" will never see eye-to-eye with "Mars", right?
    New mantra to have the man in your life repeat:
    Toilet seat down, replace empty toilet paper roll!
    Thanks for your comments!


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